Why and How?

During one of the many middle of the night awakenings I had last night - (and every night) - as I adjusted my soft pillows under every possible inch of my body, I tried to imagine what is going on inside me that makes everything so painful. How can my incredibly soft wonderful pillow top mattress covered with soft down pillows and Egyptian cotton sheets, feel as painful as trying to sleep on a cliff face of jagged bedrock?  As I sat in the waiting room of the doctor's office this morning, and my elbows made the mistake of trying to take their ease on the armrest of the chair - searing, electric pain shot through my whole being. I had forgotten to put something down to cushion the blow. Oh how I miss being able to cross my legs while sitting down when wearing a dress - it is too painful for my knees to touch anything, including each other. The simple pat on my shoulder or arm from a friend or a colleague has me hiding embarrassed whimpers and grimaces of pain. The accidental bump from strangers on the busy street are excruciating. Why? Why? How could I have gone from being a normal person to this?
Scientifically, they are beginning to understand that the fibrotastic are not like normal people. Our central nervous systems register abnormally high pain responses to otherwise non painful stimuli. The body's normal chemical responses to fighting pain are all diminished in those with fibromyalgia. This is what we know. But it isn't just about being touched. Yes, our clothing hurts our skin, but why are light, sound, and smell amplified? Why do we suffer migraines and Irritable Bowel Syndrome? Why do we feel as though we are sick with a terrible flu? Why do we suddenly begin to sweat excessively, or have limbs that cease to function? Why do we lose our cognitive abilities and have diminishing gray matter in the brain? Why do we have severe sleep disorders and chemical sensitivities? Why do we gain weight in spite of the fact that we don't eat? How did we get this way? Who can fix us? And how do we get the non-fibrofabulous to understand how truly devastating, painful, debilitating this illness is, when we seem to look so normal? Everything about this is so complex... one wants it to be simple...  about some aches and pains, stiffness in the joints.. and yes, we get that too -- but there is nothing simple or easy to explain it all, the pain is deeper than muscles and tendons - and it is more than just widespread pain... Medications help lessen the pain, but it never stops... so why do we have it - where did it come from - and how can we make it go away?